Nelia Gyemfi

The Folly of Self love

Leave a Comment / Self-love. /

The Folly of Self Love The folly of self love is basically refusing to grow, learn, inspire and change. The world will tell you that if people leave your life, let them go! They are the problem, not you. Some will also say they didn’t deserve to be a part of my life, good riddance to bad rubbish. Worse off, is those who say “I am me, deal with who I am or walk away”. There are two sides to this coin. Truth being told, not everyone has to be a part of your life, which is the first side of this coin. Your life is like a tree. There are the roots, the branches, and the leaves. The leaves in your life are the very temporary people. Those people are not meant to be stuck with you forever. Usually these are the persons who teach you a few lessons about life, relationship and friendship. Mind you, a tree can have millions of leaves, but they’re still leaves. They’re there to take from the tree, and give shade to the tree, thus block your shine. The branches, are more cunning than the leaves. The branches appear to give some form and stamina to the tree and leaves. It has more direct contact to the tree. However, when a mighty wind blows, or a storm hits the tree, these branches fall off. So will the people who are branches in your life. They give you temporary support and form. It feels as though they’re unimaginably connected to you in all facets of your life; but hold on. When life’s pressures hit you, and the storms of life come at you, they fall off and leave, and all you have left are the roots! THE ROOTS, not visible through the humus filled soiled, but are ever present. Akans have a proverb, that even a stump of tree has hope of growing into a mighty tree again one day, because of the presence of the roots. The roots are the “realest” people there is. If you have just a few of them in your life, keep them. Because even when your life falls apart, they’ve got nowhere going. They are not fair-weather friends like the branches, neither are they shady friends like the leaves. The second part of the coin is if no one wants to be a part of your life, you’re the problem. Be it as it may, the leaves, branches and roots come together to form a tree. A tree without roots cannot have branches and consequently leaves. A tree without leaves is deemed to be a dead tree. I guess all I am saying is, regardless of who they are and what part they play in your life, you need one or two people around. If no one, not even “leaves” want to be in your life, my dear, you’re the problem. I believe one thing in life, that people are drawn to people of their kind. I beg your pardon, even insane people on the streets identify and roll with one another. No matter who you are, there are people you should be able to identify yourself with. The folly of self love is for those who feel they’re it all. People who always blame others when their friendship or relationship doesn’t work. It takes two to tango. The basis of the folly of self love is selfishness. The “me, myself and I”. The I am perfect clause. The no need to change who I am for anyone. From where I sit, I have identified three items and misconceptions about self love which results in folly. • I CAN’T AND WON’T CHANGE; THIS IS WHO I AM: It is indeed true, that God intentionally and deliberately made you who you are. You are unique indeed. But, when you don’t accept that as human, you’re not flawless, and as such you must make the conscious effort to be the better and original you that you are then there’s trouble. • IF THEY LOVE ME, THEY’LL TAKE ME AS I AM: This is the most pathetic lie you could ever tell yourself. Whatever improvement, growth and change you go through its for yourself first, before society. No one has to deal with a piece of work. No one loves a liability. • THEY DON’T DESERVE ME: If you’ve ever said this to yourself, I really hope you sat to think about it well. As I mentioned earlier on, you don’t need to keep everyone around you. The bitter truth is there’s always some better deserving than you. No matter who you are, there’s someone, somewhere, this minute, better than you in every sense of the word. All am saying is be wise enough to accept it when something is your fault. It’s difficult I know. Shifting blame always seems like the pleasurable route out, but until when will u keep deceiving yourself, that no one deserves you?

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Hannah

3 Comments / Bible Character Study /

Hannah. Many many many years ago a man lived. He had two wives. The wife whom he dearly loved was barren. The other bore him a lot of children that his heart was at peace; but for a while. The woman who bore him children mocked the one whom he loved, but was barren. The woman whom he loved wept and prayed. Her tears were her three square meals for a day. And it was, that every year, this man together with his half happy half sad family will visit the Lord at Shiloh to pray, offer sacrifices and commune with the Lord and one another. And it so happened, that on this particular journey to Shiloh, something extraordinary happened. There was a shift in the woman who he loved’s prayer life. She knelt down at the altar and prayed her womb out. She prayed for long hours nonstop – a prayer marathon. She prayed till she could utter no words. She prayed till her ribs felt like they were cracking out of dryness. She prayed until she was drunk in prayer! She asked God one thing, a son, whom she “covenanted” to give back to God when he was of age. Fast forward to the year after, the woman drunk in prayer had a son. She could not attend the annual meeting at Shiloh because she wanted to wean the son she bore so she could honour her part of the covenant as God had obviously honoured his part. Spoiler alert, the woman is Hannah, who bore Samuel, one of the greatest prophets in Israel. The one who anointed David King over Israel( oh my don’t get me started on Samuel). Hannah’s rival, Penninah mocked her. The kind of mockery that would make Hannah stay in her room all day, to avoid Penninah. The mockery that would force Hannah to starve herself all day, and sneak out at night to get some bread to munch on and wash it down with a bottle of asaana or sobolo. But when Hannah’s glory came, and she honoured her covenant, her son’s legacy has lived on till date. Not even one of Penninah’s children had their names mentioned in the Bible. Well I haven’t seen it yet, if you have, kindly let me in on it. Lessons. 1. Penninahs are needed in our lives: Hannah must have been throwing a pity party for herself already before Penninah came on the scene. But here’s the part Penninah played, her mockery made Hannah sit up, take matters into her hands and literally have a banter with God. After which she received her results. Penninahs (I actually love the name though) are the persons in our life who criticise our every move. In fact, your very existence, to them is an error. Penninah is that person who makes fun of your unfortunate situation. Penninah I that person who tells you God has forsaken you and He doesn’t love you. Penninah is the person who never wishes you well, but their lives look as though it perfect and glorious. Penninah is the reason all that glitters is not gold. But a Penninah is also the reason God will perform His word. A Penninah is the reason you should take the bull by the horn and deal with the core of your problems. That Penninah is the reason God will give you the Gold, when it looks like you have nothing put stones in your hand. 2. Ask God Until He Says Something Tangible – What prayer can’t do, more prayer can do. What more prayer can’t do, much more prayer will do! Hannah prayed until she had heaven’s attention and submitted her petition. Hannah travailed in prayer, and she brought forth. She literally touched the hem of God’s garment like the woman with the issue of blood 3. Honour God when He Honours you. Don’t try playing smart. Do what you said you’d do and do it well. Hannah didn’t play wayo! She did what she said she would, gave the son back to God. Theologians actually believe that she had other sons after Samuel; because she honoured her word. God is not a man that He would lie, nor the son of man to change His mind. Love, Nelia.phenomenalwoman Ps: Don\’t forget to let me know you passed by ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

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Interview-Excellencial.

6 Comments / Interviews, Uncategorised /

Miss Excellencial Betty Boatemaa With the spate of unemployment, especially for young university graduates in our country, it takes bravery, innovation and positivity to decide to be an entrepreneur. Finding an opportunity in what seems to be a competitive world is worth celebrating. Today, our guest,  a twenty-four-year-old graduate of KNUST decision against all odds to stand a business; a unique and pretty interesting one at that. Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Excellencial Betty Boatemaa Nelia: Hi Betty, kindly  tell us about yourself and your business most especially. Betty: Having started Excel Sobolo while at the University, I gained experience in marketing as the General Manager. I had the opportunity to improve my communication skills, interpersonal skills and decision making skills. Juggling academic work and business at school produced effective time management skills in me. The joy of starting an initiative and working towards its success continued after University. Currently I am the Founder of Kubenut. Kubenut is a partnership type of business which is responsible for production of packaged tender coconut water and the coconut pulp. Kubenut aims to deliver nutritious, thirst quenching, refreshing, energizing and high quality tender coconut water and its pulp to its customers. Kubenut places a great deal is on safety, hygienic, healthy and attractive packaging. Customer satisfaction is our hallmark. It is a part time work at the moment and wish to expand it in future. I have a goal of reading International Business Management as my second degree programme to boost my business development and management skills. In future, I want to be Business Developer and Marketing Manager for a global brand company in the industry of food and beverages. Nelia: Goals! You will surely achieve what you\’ve set out to achieve. How growing up like for you? Betty:  Growing up having a teacher as a mother, you got to learn hard and excel. My childhood was more about books. So I guess my childhood was pretty normal then. Nelia: What motivates you in life. Betty: Successful stories of people who have made it in life. People who have made in against all of life’s circumstances. I feel like I have no excuse to fail at all. Nelia: Any particular unfortunate experiences that you’ve encountered in life? (Any story you can share that will inspire and encourage someone reading it.) Betty: I didn’t grow up to see a male figure in my house, my mother has played both roles and she is a fighter. She is now on pension but was a Diploma Teacher. By grace, she has seen all of us through the university. I am the last born. It hasn’t been easy financially, but God has been good. She is my number one role model. Nelia:I\’m sorry about not having a male figure in your life. But all things work together for our good. How did you rise above it? Betty: The excellence mindset. Nelia: The excellence spirit indeed. I\’m pretty convinced this is what incited you to start your own business right after leaving school. As a startup entrepreneur, what influenced your decision to start KUBENUT? Betty: The fact that any fruit can be taken in the office except coconut because of the nature of the fruit. So then I figured if it cold be packaged neatly and made convenient, people, especially  those in the corporate sector will patronise it. Nelia: Exactly. Find a problem in society, find a way to fix it. People will pay for it.  Howbeit I suppose it hasn\’t been a smooth ride. What are some of the risks you had to take as a startup? What has kept you going? Betty: Financial risks and what keeps me going is knowing that a customer is satisfied with your product and services. It gives you some unexplainable joy. Nelia: Where do you envision KUBENUT to be in the next 5 years? Betty: In 5 years’ time, I see Kubenut obtain Food and Drugs Authorization number, have had more hands on board and have captured the whole of Greater Accra and another region. Nelia: How would you define success? Betty: Having positive influence and impact on your society. Nelia: Growing up, who’s been your mentor and why? Betty: Joyce Meyer. She had fought the good fight of faith and she is where she is now. Nelia: If you were a book, what would be your title and why? Betty: How Grace Works. Because my life is grace influenced. Nelia:  We all are indeed grace bound! If you were a colour, which one would you be and why? Betty: Red, signifying the blood of Jesus, so precious to me. Nelia: THE BLOOD! What does it mean to be a Phenomenal Woman for you? Betty: A Phenomenal Woman is a woman who is influencing her society positive and having impact on them. Nelia: Finally, an advice to your fellow sisters out there. Betty: Seeth thou a man diligent in his ways, he shall stand before kings. Be diligent in what you do, you will be at the top. Nelia: See you at the top darling. Thank you! This interview was made possible by Arbie Marfoa Marfo, Team Member of the Phenomenal Woman Blog and a great friend of Miss Betty. Don\’t forget to let me know you passed by! Love, Nelia

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Looking Witihin

20 Comments / Self-love. /

Looking Within-Self-Love as a Christian   At the beginning of the series, I mentioned the fact that Self-love is a phenomenon that has been foreign in the body of Christ for a long time. It’s rather sad, that as children of the light and of the kingdom, we lose guard of what we have. The world takes it from us, then we attempt to copy it back from the world, when we have the original prototype. The question then is, as a Christian young woman and a budding phenomenal woman, what does self love mean to you? Ziona takes us through the answer. I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. (Galatians 2:20) This scripture is like a master key that opens many doors only if you would use it. Let us take Galatians 2:20 as it is; thus as believers we are dead (\”I no longer live\”) and there is a major takeover of our bodies by Christ . Now, we are alive but this time around In Christ and this is by Faith. So for anyone to get to you or for you to even find yourself, you must go through Christ! Remember that Christ in you is the hope of Glory and to attain that glory includes knowing Christ first, then knowing your position in Him. To love Christ is to know Him more than just the Christmas story of Him born in a manger. To love Christ is to know Him more. Learn about Him from His Word(the Bible) and even more from the Holy Spirit (John 14:26). When you begin to love Christ in you, there are things you begin to do, attitudes you begin to exhibit, your very demeanor changed. In fact you begin to bear good fruits (physical changes or noticeable characteristics of a Christian). Thereafter would you be conscious of who you are in Christ.(your royalty, the power and authority you command, your position, benefits and many more) Take note of this, this is not applicable to the unbeliever because he/she does not have Christ in him or her. This is why we must be careful not to rush to follow trends of \”self love\” the way an unbeliever would. If you do so, you\’ll end up in the wrong track. Your boast must be in the Lord. (Psalm 34:2) Do not be deceived, this does not mean that when you love Christ in you, you become timid, insecure, shabby clothing, not taking the spotlight or leadership positions. If you do these things you rather make the blood of Jesus of no effect! Mercy. You loving Christ every moment of each day opens the eyes of your heart to see the glory of the Lord risen upon you. (Isaiah 60:1-2) You will begin to see an inner beauty which radiates from the inside outwardly. As that happens, you begin to feel more confident wherever you go because you acknowledge there is more to you. (Joshua 1:9) You neither dress indecently nor shabbily to gain a false sense of love, confidence and attention . You dress like a royal, decent but still good looking. Your crown radiates the glory of Heaven here on earth. Ever seen a queen wearing sensually provocative clothes? No I don\’t think so. Yet you call yourself a \”slay Queen\”. What on earth are you slaying? The last time I checked,  Queens don\’t slay, (that is destroy), Queens build. You want to be called a queen? Work for it.  Your speech is not uncouth or filled with fear but instead it is filled with wisdom and authority (1 Peter 2:9) You do not allow yourself to be filled with gloomy and depressed thoughts because you know you have the mind of Christ and all things shall turn around for your good. For He that is in you is greater than he that is in the world. You would never realize this if you do not look within and see Christ. Trust me on this; when you put a conscious effort to do this, you will see the manifestation of a new creation and nothing will stop you! P. S- For the single ladies and even those already hooked up listen, the gentleman MUST reach into Christ to get to you. If he found you on the road to Christ, you had better make an informed decision. \”And do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers \”.There are some unbelieving believers out there (but that is a story for another day) so dear Phenomenal woman do WATCH AND PRAY. Beautifully written by Ziona Neequaye( Team Member, THE PHENOMENAL WOMAN ) Love, Nelia.phenomenalwoman  I\’d love to know you read this piece, kindly drop your comments below. 

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Rahab

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Rahab Hello everyone. We will be doing a short study on Rahab for this month. Rahab is first mentioned in the Bible in Joshua 2. Remember the two men who were sent by Joshua to spy the land of Jericho? Yhup, it was Rahab’s place they lodged. Okay, I know you knew that already. I hope we also remember it was around the same time the Lord was about sending His children into the Promised Land. Rahab is a name which means broad, spacious or vast. It is believed the first part of her name(Ra) might have been from the Egyptian god Ra. She dwelt on the city wall in Jericho. Jericho was a pagan environment where almost every  tom, dick and harry that dwelt there participated in idol worship. She dwelt there with her father,mother, brothers and sisters. She was a prostitute(or harlot). We can also see that she had some knowledge about the God of Israel(Joshua 2:10,11). She is one of the only four women mentioned in the genealogy of Jesus Chris(Matt 1:5). She is the only woman mentioned by name in the hall of faith in Hebrews 11. Lessons to be learnt from Rahab Rahab was a thinker! The first thing that strikes me about Rahab is her ability to think and act. And I see this in various acts of hers. For instance; The way she responded when she was asked about the men. Oh yeah…..she did lie. But we are not bent on highlighting any weakness of hers. She gave them an answer(and with bravery) which they had no reason to doubt for a second. The men didn’t even consider searching her room for the spies just in case she had lied.   And thinkers observe and strategise… We see her in Joshua 2:16 advising the spies on what to do so they are not discovered by their pursuers. I believe this advice stemmed from the fact that she had observed and understood the way things worked in her community. So now, I want you to pause. Is there any aspect of your life you can apply the principle of observing and strategizing. You see, phenomenal women( and men too) make their society better. They are proble. To be a problem solver and an agent of positive change in your society, you should learn to observe and plan. It shouldn\’t end with just thinking and planning, let\’s learn to take action. Let\’s learn to take initiative.   The concern she had for her family From our introduction, we understand that Rahab’s family also lived in Jericho. We’re not too sure why she wasn’t living with them in the same house. Some have attributed it to the fact that she may have been estranged from her family because of her profession. Nevertheless, we see a woman who wasn’t selfish and secured safety for her family. So firstly, I just want to encourage you to create strong bonds of unity and love in your family. Let your family know you care and that God gave you to them for a reason. It honestly feels good to know that you have a family supporting you. And also as the old adage goes, \”Charity begins at home.\” Showing love to people around you isn’t fruitful if you can’t show love to the wonderful family God has given you (and family is not always blood). In a similar vein, if you want to be a difference in society, start being a difference in your family, right where you are.   Faith For someone who had been exposed to idol worship right from birth, she demonstrated a very admirable degree of faith. And her consciousness of the power and might of God is amazing.(Joshua 2:10,11) It is no surprise then that we find her name in the Hall of faith. I believe her faith in God also prompted her to make such a great request of her family being spared(Josh 2:12,13). And we see from Joshua 6 that this faith was rewarded. So to conclude, I want to say I get excited when I see Rahab, who was once a prostitute appear in the genealogy of Jesus Christ. It reminds me that I have a God who can take the foolishness of this world to confound the wise. It also encourages me not to look down on myself or allow myself to be held mentally captive by my past. God is good. I can be a great shining star no matter how darkened my life may has once been. God richly bless you for reading. beautifully written by Arbie Marfoa Marfo  ( team member of the Phenomenal Woman) 

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Sena Wogormebu

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Sena Wogormebu Ladies and well gentlemen today\’s interview features a lovely young woman with the things of God at heart, a talented and skilled footballer or soccer player amongst many others. She\’s a person with a set focus in life and goals to achieve. Sit back, pick notes, enjoy! Nelia: Hi Sena, kindly tell us about yourself. Sena: I am a young person, 20 years of age. At this point in life I am working on two things: the inside of my heart and the inside of my pockets. I like the idea of grinding in your 20s, building in your 30s and chilling in your 40s. If I should describe myself using one word, the word is vivacious (full of life and good spirits… happy and lively in a way that is attractive). I like fashion, football and photography. I’m a big fan of goals, I love black excellence, and most importantly I love God. I’m currently in my second year at university studying Marketing with Digital Communications. Nelia: How was growing up like for you? Sena: Growing up for me has been great. I’m from a family of six: three sisters, myself, my mum and dad. My sisters and I are close in age and we share a very strong bond. For this reason, I am big on family and girl power! Nelia: Girl Power she says. On that note what motivates you in life? Sena:What motivates me in life is my vision of the future. I have put plans together which makes me look forward to what is to come and knowing that God has even bigger plans for me makes it ten times more exciting. Nelia: Why soccer? Which position do you play? Sena: Growing up, I was a bit of a tomboy. All my friends were boys and hanging out with them included getting involved in most of the things they were into, which included soccer. After a while I got really deep into it, even when my friends stopped pursuing it, I continued. I play as a striker. [/av_textblock] [av_video src=\’http://vimeo.com/120007335\’ format=\’16-9\’ width=\’16\’ height=\’9\’] [av_textblock size=\’\’ font_color=\’\’ color=\’\’ admin_preview_bg=\’\’] Nelia: What are some lessons or experiences that you’ve had with playing soccer, especially as a young woman. Any stereotypes or the sort? Sena: Growing up, soccer wasn’t popular amongst girls so I always found myself playing soccer with boys. I was always the only girl amongst a group of about 20+ boys. A lot of the time boys used to look at me thinking ‘she’s just a girl, she doesn’t know how to play football’ until I touched the ball and shocked them. I gained a lot of respect through this and so many times I have been told by boys ‘I’ve never known a girl that is able to play soccer the way that you do’ or ‘I didn’t know that girls could play soccer’. Nelia: Hahaha they didn\’t know girls could play soccer huh? This journey wouldn\’t have been easy. What sacrifices have you had to make to be at the point you are right now in soccer? Sena: A big sacrifice I made for soccer was leaving my family behind in the U.K. as I went to play ball in the States. I sacrificed a comfortable life in pursuit of my dreams. It was at this stage of my life where I discovered that outside of your comfort zone is where you grow and really experience life for what it is. I explored so many new things and went through so many challenges. Through this I learned so much. I definitely feel that the sacrifice was worth it.  Nelia: \”Outside of your comfort zone is where you grow and really experience life for what it is\”.  What are your short term and long term goals with regards to career, sports, and life in general. Sena:My career goals are as follows: – Graduate – Work in digital marketing – Work in the film industry – Start my own businesses – Charity work, missionary work, ministry  As far as life goals I want to travel, have a husband and kids, be financially stable, be genuinely happy and fulfil destiny. Nelia: How would you define success? Sena: Success for me means accomplishing a plan, goal, dream or even an idea that you bring to fruition. It can be as simple learning how to tie your own shoelace or as big as becoming a billionaire. Nelia: As simple as tieing your shoelace or as big as becoming a billionaire. In other words, success is defined by yourself. Moving forward, do you think young Christian women are finding it difficult to identify and align themselves with the purpose of God for us? Sena: If there is any difficulty in young Christian women being able to align themselves with God’s purpose for their lives, I believe it is due to distraction from either the opposite sex or society or fear or lack of understanding. Distraction from the opposite sex by maybe getting into relationships, being head over heels for their partner or focusing so much on their appearance in order to draw that kind of attention. Girls can get wild when it comes to boys and love. I say distraction from society in the sense that society makes you focus on things of the world such as beauty and money, whereas Christianity is more concerned with the things above – hence the scripture seek FIRST the kingdom of God and His righteous. I mentioned fear because when it comes to God, often times you can be left not knowing how and when things will happen, which is why faith is a key ingredient. And finally lack of understanding. The bible says ‘my people perish due to lack of understanding’ – understanding scripture, understanding the plan of God for your life and understanding that heaven and hell is real.  Nelia: Preach on sister! Indeed for lack of knowledge of who we are we perish in this world

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The What Factor

Leave a Comment / Self-love. /

The What Factor of Self-Love Inasmuch as we all strive to be the coloured versions of ourselves (go read my series on be your selfie if you haven’t to understand what it means to be your coloured self), there are certain things about us we cannot change. We have to embrace them wholeheartedly. I read about a black young lady in America. A white guy told her you’re pretty even though you are black. Her response, epic! She said, “I am not pretty even though I am black, I am pretty because I am black! ACCEPTANCE! This is the introduction to my next post on the series, what do I have to love? You can’t choose and pick what to love and what not to love. Self-love is not a buffet at the state Banquet or a five star hotel. It is a one meal menu, yet with so many ingredients. What I’m getting at is, Self-love is not a pick and choose game where you can go like yeah I love that, nope I don’t love that. We discussed the ingredients used in the preparation of a cake right? A lot of things go in there, depending on the type of cake of course. But at the end of the day, with the magical touch of the baker, we have a great cake for our celebrations. You are the baker of your own cake my dear. We all watch these shows for cooking and baking. There’s always the recipe but when and if you try yours, it will never taste the same as mine. I love chilli, you may not. Maybe I love my cake moist and fluffy with less sugar. Perhaps you love the texture of your cake to be like bread with lots of sugar in it. But at the end of it all, I have my cake, and I loooooooveeee it. So must you be willing to accept your cake and loooooooveeee it as well. That is self love. Acceptance. This is why it was very important to answer the how question and who question before the what question. The How and Who factors are like the processes of the baking process. The mixing, kneading, whipping, measuring and all that comes with it. The What question however, is really the point at which you take the cake from the oven. Then you’d have to accept the cake as it is or you’d have to go through the whole process again! But that is life right? Sometimes everything you’d spend a fortune of time and money in just falls off like a tower without a foundation. It is as if the very support of your life has been swooped from underneath you. But you’d have to get the oven set again, mix up the ingredients again and again till you get what you desire, then accepting it will come with so much ease and fulfilment. The How factor, most importantly demands that you LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL; YOUR HEART, MIND, SOUL AND STRENGTH. I call this the dimension of love. And getting this step right is very important because all the others rest on the strength of this. The Who Factor talks about loving you. Ordinarily, it would have been love the ‘raw’ or ‘real’ you. But I’d say work on the ‘raw’ and ‘real’ you. You owe it to yourself. Invest in your self and in your personal development. You are far above rubies. That is your work. Rubies are red jewels or red diamonds. They’re worked on as well after they’re mined. They go through a process of refinement. That is the process you have to go through as well, to attain your worth of not being a Ruby, but being far above the worth of the Ruby. I hope you catch this revelation. After this process of refinement which includes going through fire, being hammered, shaped and all, then you can confidently answer the What factor, by saying I accept who and what I have become. I love the cake I have been able to bake. Love, Nelia.phenomenalwoman

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The Who Factor

Leave a Comment / Self-love. /

The Who Factor In the “HOW FACTOR” of the Self love series, I ended on the What question. Which is, you can’t choose and pick what to love and what not to love about yourself. The original plan was to continue on that note but there’s been a little bit of a twist that would help the chronology of this series. On that note, today we’ll discuss the “Who Factor”. I hope it is safe for me to assume that every person reading this post today practises certain basic personal hygiene such as bathing everyday and brushing. Attempt to go 3 days without a bath and you will not recognise yourself in the mirror. Oh and I dare you not to brush your teeth for just 2 days. You’ll look around to see if there’s a gutter around when you open your mouth to yawn. (I’ll come back to this analogy in a bit) The Who Factor addresses the question who is the object or the receiver of the Self-love. Easy right? Yourself some will say. But just hold on. Why can’t you just wake up, put on clothes and walk out of your house to work or wherever as the case may be. You will need to keep yourself in a presentable way before you step out of your house. As a person, we realise the need to put some amount of effort in grooming ourselves and taking care of our physical needs and hygiene. Now the Who Factor refers to you, first of all. But loving the “raw” you doesn’t really help anyone especially you. Bishop Dag Heward Mills in his message titled “HOW TO FULFIL YOUR PROPHECIES” mentioned that as an ordinary person, ‘you are not nice.’ You need to put effort and time to make yourself nice. You need to groom yourself, take care of everything that concerns you to attain a certain level of ‘niceness’. I do not completely agree with certain extreme body modifications. In my opinion, it is an insult to the one who created you in His image, gave you His life and formed you with His own hands. However, loving the raw, unadulterated, unimproved self is pretty mediocre. The law of nature even supports growth. So must you. You need to grow, and not just in physique. Your spirituality, intellect, personality and everything else that matters. Just as you can’t live without taking a bath or brushing your teeth, you cannot say you love yourself without making the conscious and deliberate effort to become better at every point in time. The best gift you can give to yourself is to work on the “raw” you. You owe it to yourself, nobody owes you that responsibility. Not your parents, not your pastor, not your spouse. What am I saying, not even God owes you that. Lazy people who don’t like house chores such as cleaning, washing or cooking don’t bother me. You can always pay someone to get them done for you. In fact that is someone’s occupation and profession. Here’s the real deal, the work you owe to yourself can not be done by anyone else but you. One aspect of Self love is walking away from anything and anyone that adds no value to your life. The other side of the coin, however, is adding the value to your life yourself. The value you give yourself, is the value others will give to you. Same unit of measurement. Being your ‘natural’ self or ‘raw’ self isn’t enough. Improve your skills. Make meaningful use of your talents and gifts to benefit others. Live a purpose-filled life. And don’t pass out of this side of eternity full; leave having emptied yourself. Love, Nelia.phenomenalwoman

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Mary Magdalene

4 Comments / Bible Character Study /

From Demoniac to Disciple. The Lord\’s right-hand woman   Have you ever come across the famous painting of the last supper by Italian artist, Leonardo Da Vinci? If you have, you may have noticed a feminine looking character sitting on the left hand of Jesus. You probably haven\’t but that it\’s alright because this post is going to talk about what you didn\’t see in the painting, which is a feminine looking character which some people believe to be Mary Magdalene. My work is not to justify whether or not this assertion is true or otherwise. On the contrary, my work is to study the character of Mary Magdalene and her ministry during Jesus’s days on earth. Mary Magdalene or Mary of Magdala was the most prominent female follower of Jesus Christ. Born in Magdala in Judea, she was a Jewish woman and had been recorded to have seen both the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Magdala means “tower” or “castle,” and in the time of Christ was a thriving, populous town on the coast of Galilee about three miles from Capernaum. Dye works and primitive textile factories added to the wealth of the community. It may be that “The Magdalene” was connected with the industry of the town for it would seem as if she was not without means, enabling her to “serve the Lord with her substance”. Before we study Mary Magdalene’s life and character, I deem it necessary to dissociate and liberate our minds from those who connect her with prostitution or being a harlot. Although Mary was a woman of high standing and comfortable circumstances, she suffered from the malady of periodic insanity from the demons that possessed her very being and not harlotry. We are not privy to a lot of background information about Mary Magdalene, thus before she met Christ. Her life and story and ministry began after she met Christ up until the resurrection of Christ. Luke 8:2-3 And certain women, which had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities, Mary called Magdalene, out of whom went seven devils, And Joanna the wife of Chuza Herod\’s steward, and Susanna, and many others, which ministered unto him of their substance. Mary was the only woman who’s number of demons were mentioned. It stands to reason that amongst the women that Jesus healed of the evil spirits, Mary was the most troubled. However, the very the moment Jesus\’ compassionate eyes locked the wild-eyed and cringing woman of Magdala, He saw in her what no other person saw; the minister who would be a blessing to His own ministry and to others. There was therefore the need for this woman to be set loosed from her bondage. In His authoritative voice and with all power, He commanded the tormenting demons to come out and stay out of her. The demons couldn’t do much but to obey and succumb. Her deranged and nerve-racked mind became as tranquil as the troubled lake Jesus calmed. Sanity returned, the rosy tint was restored to her cheeks, and she was made whole. Now, “clothed and in her right mind, in dignity and strength”, she was ready to become one of the most devoted woman disciples of Him to whom she owed so much, her freedom, breakthrough, dignity, sanity and even her life! And this is how Mary of Magdala transitioned from being demon possessed to being a disciple of Christ. Lessons or Nuggets from this Character. 1. Women matter in ministry: If there’s only one lesson to pick from the character of Mary Magdalene, it will be that women play a pivotal role in ministry. Women cannot be sidestepped in the five fold ministry and many others. I say this for two main reasons. First, following the story of this woman, we realise that she followed Jesus right from the moment of her sanity till his death and resurrection. And Joanna the wife of Chuza Herod\’s steward, and Susanna, and many others, which ministered unto him of their substance. Mary became a disciple. Freed from demonic shackles, she became the right hand woman of the Lord, his personal person, his body body, his hommie! Her personal ministrations, along with those of other women who had been healed, greatly aided Jesus in His missionary activities as He travelled from place to place preaching and teaching His message. Grateful, these women became generous, ministering unto Him of their substance. Mary left her home in Magdala to follow Jesus. Constantly on the move as Jesus and His disciples were, there were many details in connection with their personal comfort and well-being requiring attention to which these women could see. Quietly and effectively Mary would do what she knew needed to be done. Further, money was necessary for the Master’s campaign work. We never read of Him or His disciples asking for money, yet funds were necessary. Much of it came from Mary and other women like her who had been so richly blessed of the Lord. Now it was time for Christ to be crucified. Mary went with her Lord into the shadows of death not forsaking Him at that darkest moment of His ministry, not thinking of what was going to be left of her after her Lord and Saviour was gone. She followed Jesus on His last sad journey from Galilee to Jerusalem, not as the preacher or teacher she knew him to be, but as one going to die a shameful death befitting of criminals and murderers. And as they followed, they still “ministered unto Him.” Mary was present with the other holy women at the mock trial of Jesus. Mary was present in Pilate’s Hall and saw and heard the religious leaders yearning for the blood of Him who was so precious and dear to her heart, the darling of Heaven. She listened as Pontius Pilate pronounced His death sentence of crucifixion although he had found no fault in Him. She witnessed and wept as Jesus left the

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DR ADAMS.

Leave a Comment / Interviews /

  When I was in primary school I asked my mum which profession was \”higher\” : a nurse or a doctor . She answered : a doctor. Pleaseoooooooo my mum is a nurse wai, dont start argueing. So I told her that, then I\’ll be a doctor. I got a lady-bird dictonary gift from a family friend when I was in sunday school after 1 of my numerous little sermons. Whiles flipping through, I found the word \”pediatrician\”. Ooooooo so my big head on a small body decided to be a pediatrician and I was still in primary school. 1 of my primary school teachers started calling me \”mpanie\” (hehhe..forgive my twi). In JSS, I started writing on alllllllllll of my books \”DR.ADAMS\”(Abigail Doduwah Abena Maame Sackey)and some teachers started calling me that and most importantly my mum and the rest of my family members joined in. Parents , speak \”life\” into the lives of your children. My name is DR.ADAMS. ..if you want to honor my family aaa then call me Dr.Sackey(and no, I\’m not a ga. I\’m from Enyan denkyira….and no my fante sucks). …if u ask me aaa then me dier please just call me A MIRACLE And that is how we begin today\’s interview with Dr. Ewurabena Adams( well we\’ll find out pretty shortly whether the ADAMS is an acronym or not) So this was the first post of her I read. Immediately after reading it, I inboxed her. I honestly didn\’t think she was going to reply, well for obvious reasons( lol) but she did, and pretty quickly too. Oh wait, I sent her a friend request first. Yes, then she accepted almost immediately,  then I inboxed her. Anyway, so I had this admiration for her right from when I read her post. The PHENOMENAL WOMAN BLOG hadn\’t even commenced yet. In fact,  during that period, I was busily wasting my energy on a campaign when God had it all figured out just like that. He watched me do it all to the end. Then He said, abi you\’re done chasing what wasn\’t the real deal. Well now that I have your attention, let\’s work! Wheeww I feel like I\’m taking the attention of today\’s interview  (well, you can\’t blame me, I have looked forward to this interview even before Phenomenal Woman was born so allow). My dear Phenomenal Woman, I present to you the exclusive interview with DR EWURABENA ADAMS! Nelia: Who’s Dr Ewurabena Adams? Dr. Adams: My name is Abigail Doduwah Abena Maame Sackey (A.D.A.M.S).  I\’m the 3rd and last born of my parents. I\’m a practicing medical doctor. Nelia: oh so the Adams is indeed an acronym as I suspected. How was growing up like for you? Dr. Adams: I grew up in a middle class family in a couple of compound houses in Accra.  I enjoyed my childhood as a tomboy,  I followed my brothers everywhere and I have scars to prove them.. Hehe Nelia: What were some of the life’s lessons you’ve grown up to understand and appreciate more. Dr. Adams: Life lessons : give and give and give….. Smile a lot… Be determined and follow your dreams wisely….love others and be at peace with everyone, or at least try. Most importantly love God (if you love Him,  you\’ll obey his commandments)  Nelia: Give, give and give! Why did you choose to be a doctor?( I mean I get that question a lot so why not throw the bomb at some one if it\’s in my possession now) Dr. Adams: well, its all in the except of the post I wrote last year. But to summarise matters, lets say i saw mum loving what she did as a nurse and she was good at it.  I decided to follow her footsteps but a little \”higher\”. I wanted to continue where my mum had stopped and by God\’s grace, this is where we are now.  Nelia: I read your testimony about how you got into med school and all in order to accomplish your dreams. (Which by the way, is this very post up here. I really entreat everyone to go on to her fb wall and read the whole story) but in the meantime, be generous by giving us a gist of it. Dr. Adams: Hmmm,  this is a whole book.  But in summary God made a way for me to study medicine in Russia through a scholarship when I was rejected by the universities in Ghana.  And by His grace I came out with flying colors.  Hallelujah! Nelia: Amen. I always say, that a disappointment is really an appointment in disguise! Now lets talk about being a woman shall we? Do you think young Christian woman are finding it difficult to identify and align themselves with the purpose of God for us? Dr Adams: Sadly and rightly so my dear. Most christian young women are trying to be \”accepted \” in this world and the means doesn\’t matter to them which is sad.  Nelia: Who’s your mentor? Dr. Adams: I have a couple of  mentors depending on which aspect of life I want to polish.  I\’ll name just one here,  my mother – Mrs Lucy Sackey. She is the strongest woman I know,  her generosity always baffles me even when she doesn\’t have.  Her prayer life is something I want for myself and her dedication and love for God is enviable. She is the best gift in person God has given me ever!  Nelia: Life can indeed be bleak at times… what keeps you going during such difficult periods? Dr. Adams: I think of three things. Past – where God brought me from. Present – what God is doing in my life Future – what God will do in my life I look to Him,  the author and finisher of my faith and that He is really the I AM THAT I AM. Hallelujah!  Nelia: Apart being a Dr, what do you enjoy doing? Something fun and exciting. Dr. Adams:

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