Be your Selfie IV!!! (Final Post).

In the previous post on the ” be your self” series, we made mention of the fact that there are two kinds of people who are somewhat content with themselves. 

We said there were the black and white copies who are very  appreciative of who there were but at the same time were mediocre in their thinking or way of life. They wouldn’t strive to be the very best of themselves yet they get envious of those who vow to make the best of their situation. 

The second kind of persons were the coloured copy. The one who accepts who he or she is, but doesn’t settle for mediocrity nor anything less. These are the kind of persons we want to be. And in today’s post, we shall discuss how we can be the coloured versions of ourselves. Right before then, let’s talk a tiny winny bit about the PARABLE OF THE TALENTS.

I’m pretty sure we all are familiar with this story from our Sunday School days. However, let’s discuss it’s relevance and bearing on the topic. The ones who had 5 and 2 talents each made an extra 5 and 2 talents out of it. They harnessed what had been given to them to produce more such that even if the master came and said give me back what I gave unto you, they will still have some extra left to work with. But the one who had one, did nothing. In fact, he did worse. He hid it. At least he should have spent it or something. He buried it. This means not only did he not make the most of the talent given, he made what he had dormant.

That is our whole discussion personified. 

Now how can you be the coloured versions of ourselves? 

  • Right from the parable above, you must harness what is within you. A lot of times, people say they do not know what their talents or unique selling points are.  But there are also a whole lot of people who know what it is, but like the servant with one talent, they give excuses as to why they can’t. 
  • Identify your weakness. Accept them and be sure they do not come in your way of being your coloured self.
  • Take responsibility for your actions, inactions and mistakes. Be apologetic when you know you are wrong not defensive. Do not look for people to blame for what went wrong in your life. 

  • Do not be scared to take initiatives, risks and push yourself to do more. Focus on what you love to do and you will still be outstanding even if there are a whole lot of persons doing the same thing. I always use @kafuipraise photography as a case study here. There will always be distractions and obstructions, but like Paul, fix your eyes on the prize and run that you may obtain.

Yours truly, 

Nelia Gyemfi…xxx

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Watch “Woman At The Well” on YouTube

Here’s to every young lady, who is being judged by everyone else except themselves, who feels the pain of yesterday and just wants to throw in the towel. Just hang on a little longer for me hunny. And if you could hasten a little bit more faster to the well, to meet HIM. HIM that has been born unto us today. 

The well could be your bed, the rug in front of your bed, your couch, your kitchen  or your porch. Just anywhere, He will be ever willing to fill your cup and quench your thirst.   

I know this piece will bless your life.

Merry Christmas my beloved Phenomenal Women!!!💓💓💓💓

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Be your selfie (II) I Am What You Cannot See.

Heya…well well well…remember Micaela? Anyways so I came across a poem she wrote, sometime back. Probably way before our paths crossed but then I was like wow…she’s got to do a piece on the #BE YOUR SELFIE SERIES. I kind of just dropped the bombshell on her a few days ago. I text her and am like “CAELA YOU ARE DOING THE NEXT POST” She says Nelia what?! Are you sure? And I say Absolutely! !

And she stuns me when I receive the piece! And I know this piece will wow you from here to the moon and back. She addresses the issues at stake from a whole different point of view which  I whole heartedly believe will relate well with some of us. It’s true what the Phenomenal Maya  Angelo said.. that in diversity, there is beauty and there is strength. 

In the diversity Micaela inputs in this work, there is indeed beauty and strength.

Ladies and (gentlemen),

Micaela presents I AM WHAT YOU CANNOT SEE.

When I wrote this poem, I was in a very bad place. A place I have never been before emotionally, spiritually and mentally. I was trying to understand what I wanted out of life, I was scared of the future and I wanted as much as possible to please everybody and do what everybody says. I was confused, yet enlightened. I was yearning for something, yet I felt a pseudo-feeling of fulfilment. I was always in mixed emotions. Whether it was to do with love, work, academia and friends. All in all, I was in a pit left to fight a battle against myself, with myself and everybody else. So when our girl Cornelia came to me one evening and said (mind you not in so many words, but in many emoji’s haha), ‘Micaela you have to write about this!’ I immediately thought, wow really? Is she sure? There is so much history in between those lines and within the words – it’s simply bringing up the difficult side of the past. But then, after I looked at it again closely, after a year, I realised, this is indeed an empowering piece. How did I miss this? After acknowledging this, I thought, ok, yes, now, I need to look for some awesome, cool,  Bible scriptures that extremely reiterate the morals of  this poem, something that will relate to us as women and also, most importantly be able to blow our minds with excitement! Whilst frantically flying through bible quotes, I just stopped and for some reason, I went on ahead and started writing.

Therefore my African Queens, what you are about to read, is simply a brief snippet of unfiltered, raw thought processes – some of which you may agree with and have experienced. Some of which you may not agree with. And that is ok Life is a learning process and we are all entitled to our own opinions!  Now, (assuming that I haven’t lost you just yet – hold on!) let us embark on thinking about what it means to be your extra-ordinary self!

There is something that I have always admired about us African women. Besides the fact that we are strong, independently and collectively, we are aware of who we are, what we can do and what we want. We shouldn’t  see our nubian, melanin skin as a setback. It is where we draw our strength… (after we have sought to find ourselves from the image from which we were made- CHRIST). It seems that this is an instinct, it feels like it is common knowledge. Perhaps it is a common language. It is beautiful and inspiring that we speak in these secret codes. We may not explicitly use words at times to augment this, but there seems to be some form of awareness. For me, whenever I find myself looking my skin (probably when my mind is wandering off), I don’t just see my flesh and veins. I see beyond that. I see history. I see a lineage of many kingdoms and empires ingrained in my DNA. I see a woman who has found herself, not per the standards of society, nor by the expectations of family, neither is it by the pressures from comrades and mates.  (What do you see in yours? Comment below!).

We all know that we come from one or more than one nation in Africa. For instance, I am Ghanaian. However, if we think back to roughly the 12th Century, the ‘Ghana Empire’ itself consisted of many smaller regions and kingdoms going beyond the current territorial borders. It spanned across what we now know today as Mauritania and Mali. This shows that maybe I have a little Mauritanian and Malian in me! Queen, what I would like you to draw from here in my case is that  as I am a melting pot of different centuries’ old ethnic kinships, and perhaps maybe due to this I may have inherited certain characteristics in personality or appearance, I AM STILL UNIQUE; AND SO ARE YOU.  You have your own unique talents, strengths and weaknesses, vision, passion, thus, your own great personality. You have been purposefully fashioned to not be a copy of someone else. Yes, you may look like your brother or sister or your mum, but within, there is certainly no one like you. If we think back to the concept of sisterhood, we can see that it is based on a community of women coming together for a good cause. Mostly for the purpose of empowerment. The key thing to note here, is that as we do come together, we are bringing all of our talents to the table. We are walking into this community with our uncommon differences. DISTINCTIVENESS AS AN ININDIVIDUAL IS WHAT MAKES YOU GREAT.

Once again, going into why I wrote this poem, I think I wrote it in retaliation. In retaliation to what was said and thought about me. I have always known that there is something special inside of me, something that no one else can see or envision. You have that special thing inside of you too. Only you can feel it and see what it looks like. Sometimes it is pretty hazy to see, I admit. The beauty of this is going on another journey to see it and understand it again. It is what motivates you and encourages you to aspire to various heights. 

Queen, let this week be a reflection of what that thing is to you. Please understand that this makes you extra-ordinary. This makes you what you are that others cannot see.

Peace, love and blessings,

Micaela x.

Thanks for reading, sharing and liking the post. Much love, from Nelia😘😘

I am what you cannot see


Being A Single Woman

Choose your hard; choose smart and wise.

Lovely evening loves. 


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Whats in A Woman | Izzyy Eze & Thembe Mvula”


Hey Lovelies,  the last bit of #the power of Influence is just about ready as the lovely Micaela and myself put our thoughts, works and prayer together to bring you nothing short of the best post this blog has ever seen. It gets better, bigger and greater you know. 

But until then, I’m not letting you start your week without some piece to spice up your week and keep you going on this journey to being phenomenal women. I know you will be blessed by this message. 

love,peace and lots of love. 


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Janette…ikz – 31 to be Exact | 31 Status Spoken Word”

Dear Phenomenal Woman,
So today I decided to share with you all a video I watched over 2 years ago but it still ministers to me in an amazingly awesome way each time I watch it. I’ve never grown weary of watching it and I have no iota of doubt that it would be a blessing to you more than it has been to me.
Just click on the link below and it will be redirected to the video. I hope u do enjoy and please share with me what you learn from this piece by way of commenting.
Love, Nelia.

👇click here!

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Phenomenal women

dear Nelia,
Here’s a story of a young lady…who thought she needed power to make an impact in the world around her.

there lived a young girl…whose purpose and passion was to make an impact…a positive impact in the lives of the ladies on her campus. She waited till her third year…and her enthusiasm grew stronger as it was the semester to contest for the prestigious enviable position of the women’s commissioner! She took the bold courageous step as it was not an easy decision to make especially with regards to the tension which engulfed the elections that year.
Fast forward to vetting, campaigning and finally the election day.
She lost the election…and she thought to herself that was the end of her purpose and she could feel the life in her passion die out every passing second.
Nelia, that lady is you.
Now you need to understand
You do not need to be in power to be a leader!
You can still make that impact without being given a mandate…and that’s when people acknowledge the impact. 
Disappointments occur because there are positive possibilities in your life. Use the occasion to explore and express the best of those possibilities
Turn those disappointments into a possibility of fulfilling your purpose and birth the passion in you!  
                                Love, the inner you!