Every one Wins, but you, in the game of anger and resentment. On Friday, I read a piece from my friend and senior learned colleague Eunice Mensah on her blog (livelearnlove4va.blogspot) and she mentioned something that stuck out to me.
She said “ I used to think I couldn’t control how I thought.. hear me this day, you can control your thoughts” .
I’ve been praying about the next series of posts and up until this evening, I had nothing. Nothing. No inspiration whatsoever but I need to publish this evening.
I just started to pray, usually I do that before posting. And I felt a strong urge to get personal. Share a life story that will inspire others.
The relevance of my friend’s post will come up shortly.
I was in my second year at the University. My then “boyfriend and I “ had just split for reasons I well do not know and never actually bothered to find out.
But I was at a certain place. A place of anger. A place of hurt. A place of resentment. Here’s the funny part, I thought I was hurting him by being and staying angry.
Until it got to a point, that I couldn’t recognise myself again, even when I stared right in the mirror. I had become this resentful angry and scornful person. And that made me cry, because I was loosing myself in my anger. And that is why everyone else wins when you stay angry but you! You loose yourself.
It was in the year 2015. On the eve of the new year into 2016, I asked God one thing. I said father, I don’t want to be angry. Not ever again. Sounds funny right? I mean people are naturally annoying. Loved ones will hurt you. How do you say you do not want to be angry again? Is it even possible?
I took the step to write it out in my journal. I studied the word of God on anger, and now the relevance of my friend’s post, I made the intentional decision to be a sweet ball of joy, and to exude positivity where ever I go. My presence should bring people together, and should bring peace. I controlled my thoughts regarding anger.
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.
The angry woman has been politicised and gendered. Feminists are fighting, arguing that women can be angry too. Which is correct, I mean we are only humans. But you see, an angry, vengeful woman gets little to nothing done. A woman with grit and grace does.
You will be irritated, yes. You will be pissed off. You will be flamed, yes. I don’t know for you, but I’ll rather be thought of as the pleasant, jolly woman who exudes grit, grace and glamour than the angry, vengeful woman.
The next couple of weeks, we will study anger! Yes Anger. The red eyed monster.
The Christian woman and her Anger
Everyone wins at Anger except you
How to move from a place of anger to place of tranquillity, peace and calmness.
These are the topics we’ll be discussing.
Before I sign off, here’s a poem
Anger in its time and place
May assume a kind of grace.
It must have some reason in it,
And not last beyond a minute.
If to further lengths it go,
It does into malice grow.
‘Tis the difference that we see
‘Twixt the serpent and the bee.
If the latter you provoke,
It inflicts a hasty stroke,
Puts you to some little pain,
But it never stings again.
Close in tufted bush or brake
Lurks the poison-swellëd snake
Nursing up his cherished wrath;
In the purlieux of his path,
In the cold, or in the warm,
Mean him good, or mean him harm,
Whensoever fate may bring you,
The vile snake will always sting you.
by Charles Lamb
Love; Nelia Gyemfi.
to our frequent readers and followers, thank you.
And to you that just passed by today, I’m glad you did. I’ll like to see you more often.